Overcoming Offense

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“Guard your heart with all diligence, for out of it flows the issues of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)

Whatever we focus on in our minds will eventually play out in our lives, which can then shape who we are. Our thoughts turn into feelings that have the power to control our lives, gradually steering us – and possibly our faith – in a direction we do not want to go. These are dangerous grounds. 

On Sunday, my husband spoke about offense. He stepped on my toes as well as others’. Have you ever felt justified about being offended? If you haven’t, then good for you, but that has not been my story. Over the last 6 months or so, I’ve been rehearsing offense in my mind, trying to figure out why they did what they did and said what they said. What I gathered from my husband’s teaching was that I am responsible for my reactions AND my thought life. After we came home from church, I began to talk to him and it’s really bad when you get preached to twice in one day. I was trying to explain why I was still offended by a specific situation, even after I tried to resolve the issue, but it was a fail. He said his piece and took his Sunday’s nap. I was so irritated with him! As he snored, I began to write about him. As I was writing the Holy Spirit said, “You are responsible for how you respond to the situation, regardless of the offense you’re feeling right now.” Although my husband said the exact same thing, I received it better from God. I guess I just like hearing God’s voice better. I am the manager of my emotions! Something that simple was the perfect prescription for me to release these people into God’s hands, which actually caused me to repent. I ended up confessing to God and reminding the devil that I am not to ever revisit that offense again! Being a veteran in this faith walk, I’m not crazy enough to think the enemy will take it kindly that I’m bringing my thoughts captive. In fact, I’m sure this means he is about to go even harder. That’s fine because I released that stinking thinking along with the situation and I have no plans to take it back. I’ve got too much Kingdom work to do.

While I am working on eliminating offense, I realize I should always respond in love, even when I feel justified in my negative emotions. I will exercise the ability to respond positively, taking full responsibility for my role in unfavorable situations, and allow myself to let go of negative feelings and thoughts that had previously taken residency in my mind.

Look at it this way: life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to what happens to you. Nobody gets a free pass out of disappointments in this life, absolutely nobody. We can exercise all day long but if we still eat unhealthily, we won’t see the results we are trying to achieve. A similar parallel can be made in our spiritual lives. We can pray all day long and attend church whenever the church doors are open, but if we cling to a victim mentality, then we’ve taken Satan’s bait and it will hinder the assignment that’s on our lives.

I’m not saying everything in your life can be changed by being positive. I’m saying that if you want to overcome offense then you need to adjust your thought process, your attitude, and most importantly, how you respond.

Attitude determines your altitude. I am going higher and I refuse to let others’ problems become my problem. If ever there were a hashtag moment for me, it is this: #GotMyPeaceBack

This Post Has 11 Comments

  1. First lady you said it right we have too much work in the kingdom that has to be done, so all the other foolishness turn it over to the Lord and leave it there, he can handle it way better than we can. 🎶 I know I’ve been changed 🎶. Thank you Lord for my first lady, for being so transparent 😇

  2. Your transparency in admitting your offense is refreshing! Keep sharing your truth as it ministers so much to many others!!

  3. Praise God this word is for me, and thanks you for sharing your heart with us, we have all been offended, it’s how we respond.

  4. PTL First Lady,

    I needed this word to remind me to be more mindful of people’s feelings, and most importantly to approach every situation in love… God Is Love!!!

  5. Yes, great topic sis! We’re all guilty of it. We’re not perfect. And even when we are “wearing our halos” people will purposely offend us. Thank God for his rescue! He always gives us a way out.

  6. Oh my goodness!! This is such a good word! I am struggling with yet another offense by a so called close friend. I keep replaying her responses which I view as so insincere. I think it bother’s me because I want to address it, but deep inside I need to just let it go. Thanks so much for sharing these words of wisdom!

    1. Audrea I can totally relate! It is bothersome especially because you have invested a lot in a relationship. I pray that God will allow you to release them and that you will find peace of mind in the process! Hang in there! Love you!

  7. Real stuff right there!

  8. One of the hardest things that I’ve had to learn this year is letting go of justified offense. This is especially hard in the work place when you feel as though your livelihood is on the line. I have not mastered it in any form because as you stated, once you make up your mind, the devil goes harder to bring you back under his power. I will say, that my perspective has shifted more often. This morning I heard a Pastor compare our battle with justified offense to the story of David and Goliath. So many times this story is preached with the perspective of Goliath having the upper hand when in all actuality, David did. Anyone with Goliaths height would have weak bones and double vision where as David was a professional “slinger” and his one rock would have carried the power of a 45 caliber bullet! With that perspective change, we have the upper hand and the devil is simply trying to blind us of our power to defeat that situation… long story short, offense can be BLINDING and screw up your perception and perspective but It takes strength to give it to God and continue on not let my emotions ruin my assignment. Thank you for this word today…I’m sure it will be accompanied with a test LOL

    1. Trust and believe it will be accompanied with “many” test! I loved your word picture as well! Very well articulated! You must come from a family of writers🤔 Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

  9. True dat…
    I experienced offense this past Sunday and was feeling ‘some kind of way’ concerning it. Although I spoke to the individual, there was still ‘a little something’ there. Thanks for the reminder that I am in control of my thoughts and actions.

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